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 Blood Leo ((NOBODY))

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Demitrius
11th Neo-Organization-Blood God of the Storm
Demitrius


Posts : 46
Money : 528
Join date : 2009-06-05

Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Empty
PostSubject: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeSun Jun 07, 2009 2:12 am

Name of Nobody: Blood Leo

What does it look like: Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) LionDemon

Primary Attack: Slashing- Slashes with claws and spikes, with great speed
Biting- Snaps at opponent using mouth.

Signature Move: Bloodroar- Crouches onto all fours and roars letting bolts of blood lightning shoot out of it's metal spikes. If the opponent gets with in five feet of the Blood Leo the Blood Lightning shoots towards the metal on their person and conducts through that.

Element Type: Blood Lightning(combination of Rage and Thunder)- Red and Black Lightning Bolts that don't affect the outside of an opponent but combines into their blood stream to mess up body functions, by interfering with electrical impulses. IOW: Eff's up the Central Nervous System

Drawback: All attacks are close to mid-range
Recharge: Can only use Bloodroar every three posts.
Fighting Style: Ambush (Move quickly and encircle enemy before going in for the kill)


Last edited by Demitrius on Fri Jun 12, 2009 1:25 am; edited 1 time in total
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Aeon
Leader of the Eternal Keys
Aeon


Posts : 114
Money : 787
Join date : 2009-01-30

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PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeTue Jun 09, 2009 4:34 am

Um this would be more akin to your weapon template, please look at the character template, and then go as follow snad stuff, sweet pic though.
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Aeon
Leader of the Eternal Keys
Aeon


Posts : 114
Money : 787
Join date : 2009-01-30

Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeTue Jun 09, 2009 4:37 am

Oh I see, then in that case approved but I don't see the point of Blood Lightning its not in the games, just be lightning I don't see the difference.
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Axis
Vice-Leader of the Eternal Keys
Axis


Posts : 357
Money : 2669
Join date : 2009-01-30
Age : 30
Location : Where ever I want to be.

Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeTue Jun 09, 2009 8:21 pm

Aeon, I would like to add about how the post is very short. This is not a post that i think should be accepted on this site. Considering that we have at least a 4 line posting rule that i am going to put in, but besides that not enough detail is given for this to be approved.
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Aeon
Leader of the Eternal Keys
Aeon


Posts : 114
Money : 787
Join date : 2009-01-30

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PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeWed Jun 10, 2009 12:50 am

Fine I see what you mean but , this is not an rp post, this is not even a an actual character template and like Xarin said , this would be a static character, so there is no purpose in really going in depth i mean would you expect a four line description of what a Dusk does?
Slashing and biting is pretty self explanatory, how would you expect him to say the Nobody attacks in 4 lines. Though some more information will be needed as how quickly is this nobody like is i fast and weak or strong and slow or in the middle because we don't want you to say The nobody skipped behind somebody then was going to strike with a slash that would cut ofboth of thier legs in a flash. ALso Signature is almost there, just how does the lightning shot out at the ioppenet, all around or does the ligtning stay at the spikes for a damge increase becuase if its the former case, are all the attacks close range. Please revise this and the lightning and then we will see.
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Axis
Vice-Leader of the Eternal Keys
Axis


Posts : 357
Money : 2669
Join date : 2009-01-30
Age : 30
Location : Where ever I want to be.

Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeWed Jun 10, 2009 12:54 am

Okay the all the post are one sentences. This shows no effort ONCE SO EVER!
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Xarin
Leader of the Neo-Organization; The Tempest Master



Posts : 109
Money : 803
Join date : 2009-01-30

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PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeThu Jun 11, 2009 10:18 pm

As the one who implemented this system, inactive admin/de-activated admin or not, I am taking full responsibility for the Nobody templates.

Rework ... rework ... REWORK!

Slashing/Biting?

Slashing with claws? Just a simple physical strike of it's manifestation of bodily self? Or does it happen to take it a step farther? Does this nobody proceed to hunt it's prey down in a mathmatical fashion when performing its primary attack? Or does it just 'attack' when you command it? How would it bite the enemy? Lunge forward and snap all Dracula-style? Or how will it performs such a animalistic and potentially fatal injury? Leap forward and attack? Savagely maul and pierce? Dash forward and slam into while gnashing away?

The signature move needs more description, drawback and a cool-down. Just because it's the signature move of the race does not mean it can be used continuously(For example, the Soldier Heartless' "Rising Sun" slash or the Berserker Nobodies' "Magna Storm"). There must be a specified wait time(your posts only) between usages, even one as small as one post ... albeit you'll need to notch down the power level to compensate.

Blood lightning: Okay, rage and lightning. What does it produce? Red lightning bolts? Do these bolts end up faster/slower/weaker/stronger than actual lightning? Does it come forth as a natural thing from the nobody? Or is it artificially produced entirely by the nobody? Also, it's signature move: These are what covered in what flying where, when, how, and WHY?

Nice drawback, it's not much ... but for long-range fighters, they'll know they can have an advantage.

Major-league disapproval until these corrections are seen to. (Except, it seems I'm not an admin anymore, but I'm just giving you a heads-up about these issues).
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Demitrius
11th Neo-Organization-Blood God of the Storm
Demitrius


Posts : 46
Money : 528
Join date : 2009-06-05

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PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeFri Jun 12, 2009 1:27 am

Edited.........*cough*no teamwork*cough*between admins*cough*
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Xarin
Leader of the Neo-Organization; The Tempest Master



Posts : 109
Money : 803
Join date : 2009-01-30

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PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitimeFri Jun 12, 2009 1:58 am

I apologize.

But the other admins shouldn't butt in with this Nobody creation process, at least not too much ... as it was an idea(along with the template) that I expanded on.

Thus, ignore them(JK) and listen to me when it comes to making Nobodies.

You didn't need the IOW portion when explaining the Element type.

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PostSubject: Re: Blood Leo ((NOBODY))   Blood Leo ((NOBODY)) Icon_minitime

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